Ever done parkour on a mountainside? Gone indoor rock climbing, skydiving, or bungee jumping? Yeah, me neither. That crap is scary as hell! No thanks. I sure as hell don’t want anyone pushing me off a wall or out of a plane if I can’t let go or jump myself. If you have done any of the above stop reading. You already know the comparisons I’m about to make…. Also god bless you, you are a braver soul than I.
Quick pivot- The universe has this way of holding things away from us the more we try to hold on and control things in our lives. It peels our fingers off the ledge of life, one by one until we are forced to drop against our will.
I call it God having jokes. lol
**A little word about my use of the word God- I use that name for clear reference to a higher power. I don’t care if you believe in a most powerful donut in the sky. I’m just referencing a power that is larger than you or I. Even if you’re spiritual or believe the coffeemaker will guide you to being your best self. Pick your entity. No judgments here.**
One of the lessons I gained from early loss in my life was learning how to just be and to just be OK in the midst of chaotic nothingness. Trust myself and trust that my higher power had a plan. Quite frankly there is little else to do when you’re an only child with dead parents, no job, no money, and you’re not beneficiary on anyone’s life insurance. Sitting at rock bottom of the addictions two other people had put me in a 12 step program pretty early in life. —God still has jokes for me sometimes now but since I have stood strong like a brick shithouse to life’s best shots- when life tries to creep around a corner to scare me, it doesn’t have the same effect. I might piss my pants from the initial shock but I don’t jump anymore. LOL
In any case, I am so grateful to have learned so young that I can’t control shit and the more I try the harder it gets. Hasn’t stopped me from trying over and over again, either. I said I have said that I know the lesson, not that I don’t ever forget it. Sheesh…. 😀
Here’s a simple scenario:
Let’s say you can’t drive your car because there’s no cash, gas, or car insurance and you need to go out. Theres nobody to call for a ride. No money for a bus (do people even locally take busses anymore? lol) or an Uber, Most people might not go wherever they need to go. But what if you need to go to the psychiatrist? You will find another way to get there because coming off your antidepressants could be catastrophic and lead to much worse problems. Scary ones at that. So you will have to walk and get there hella early because the walk is so far and you’d rather be early than miss your appointment. But it’s August and it’s SO hot! Bleh! And you have no water or food in the house. F-me! Guess you’re eating the last scoop of peanut butter and drinking that nasty tap water before you head out.
Or you can sit and cry about the car being out of use and all the reasons why it is that way. Then cry about each of those little issues that caused it. But you can’t stay stuck in this! I mean you CAN but please just don’t…
By the way I do encourage you to momentarily cry and be angry because that scenario sucks and since you’re NOT in the business of being a victim there’s no need to carry those emotions with you when you rise up like the badass you are to solve your problem.
Cry about it, accept it, and start using those two legs god gave you, learn to like dry ass peanut butter and compartmentalize the fact you are drinking crap from a faucet. (If you like faucet water, this doesn’t apply to you)
You get to choose! And that’s the thing, I think people have forgotten that they have choices when all else fails. Discounting their own abilities and resources. Even if the options are overly simple, taboo, or if other people will judge.
There are many more applications of what I’m trying to express but I wrote this example because sometimes the answer really is super simple but we forget that’s still an option. Another example is when I pulled my kids out of public school during the second half of 2020 because remote learning wasn’t working for them. The school admins were a tad judgey when we informed them of this decision and so were a few people who were close to us. In any case, we (husband and I) homeschooled the girls and let them do whatever the hell they wanted in between teaching them home structure and showing them they aren’t bound by the world’s rules. That they always have options despite what everyone else says. Especially when the world doesn’t know what the hell it’s doing anyway-Trust god, your donut in the sky or coffee pot and listen to your own intuition,
We are in a time now where many are struggling to find their own power in life. It’s ok to complain and vent, ( I am a complainer and a venter, too) Just know that if you haven’t been faced with anything so hard as you may be facing now, or you’re scared of our world, it’s ok, you will absolutely make it, though. Rarely, there is a situation that can’t be overcome and turned into some positive lesson later on.
I believe that’s detachment and transmutation. Trust the process and what you don’t see, AKA have faith in something greater than you that life will work out as long as you are doing everything in your power to make it better.
Be intentional with how you use your own power when you are co-creating and co-solving problems. Become more aware of your strengths and also your own resistance to change. Look out for whether or not you utilize toxic positivity but live a compartmentalized life of codependency. No shame- we are all there at points and sometimes can’t even tell when we are. Take responsibility for all of it. Understanding ourselves better than the next person is key when it feels like the universe has taken away everything you thought you needed external of you in order to be OK.
Better yet, when social media and our leaders have made us think that you NEED everything external of you in order to feel powerful and have control over your life.
You don’t have to buy the BULLS**T anymore.
I 100% promise you, you don’t need to. You don’t need as much as you have been led to believe in order to be alright.
Shut off the TV. Get off FB, X, Twitter, TikTok and go for a walk. Find a bird to look at, a deer to peep in the woods, hug a tree. And if you’re unhappy with your partner and have no money. Take a walk and don’t stop. Get to your social services appointment early. Hate your job because it’s draining, quit it and make it happen some other way.
Step into your vulnerability if you dare…before life or god makes you. Jump in the pool before mom or dad throws you in. Do something- because all god has is jokes if you keep trying to do things the way you always have.
Use your biggest unseen asset- the ability to let go and trust yourself. You will figure it out come hell or high water. Both of which are pretty close these days…
Until next time, friends. I trust you’ve got this!
Road To Harmony 
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